I would cry if this wasn't so darn funny in a Monty Pythonish sort of way. . .

Warring Monks Threaten Destruction of the Church of the Holy Sepulchre

Excerpt:

The dispute over the Deir al-Sultan monastery [a small monastery on top of the Holy Sepulchre Church] is a more recent phenomenon dating back to Easter 1970. When the Coptic monks, who had controlled the area, went to pray in the main church and left the rooftop unattended, Ethiopian monks seized the opportunity to change the locks at the entrances before the Copts returned.

Relations between the two groups have remained tense ever since [ya think?], with the Coptic Church refusing to relinquish its claim to the monastery and posting a single monk there at all times. In the midst of a blistering heatwave in the summer of 2002, the Coptic monk on duty moved his chair from its agreed spot to a shadier corner. The move was taken as a hostile manoeuvre by the Ethiopians and 11 monks needed hospital treatment after the ensuing fracas.

Again, do you really need to make movies that make fun of religion? We do a much better job in-house, sad to say.